Sex, in a stable couple relationship, has one purpose: to keep the two partners together and intimately bring them closer together. Most of the research has attributed as the maximum libidinal expression of the couple one or two years, at best, and then the inevitable decline of desire and the typical behavior of the stable couple with the evolution in brother / sister. Often this phenomenon also occurs in couples with a homosexual orientation.
In addition to seeking physical pleasure and relieving tension and stress, sex is also the most direct and effective way to convey to the other that sense of deep acceptance that every person seeks in the relationship. Often in an old-fashioned couple, when sex is missing, you hardly notice it, it appears as a problem of little importance indeed you are surprised when in a long-term couple, sex is still there.
Yet it is a common misconception that sexual desire in a couple decreases or even disappears completely after years of living together.
Maintenance sex, once called “marital duty”, is equivalent to maintaining a stable and long-lasting relationship in a deep affectionate way. Sex is a great stress reliever because it generates an increase in endorphins and oxytocin. It is also beneficial for the immune system, as it increases the production of immunoglobulin A, an antibody that helps strengthen one’s immune defenses. Having sex regularly also improves blood circulation, especially in men, and has a beneficial effect on the gray cells of the elderly.
Having little sex, on the other hand, or not having sex at all, can cause problems of various kinds. In fact, sexual abstinence can lead to stress problems and, in men, to heart disease or erectile difficulties. Making love at least twice a week, on the other hand, helps humans to halve the risk of clogged arteries and increase homocysteine levels, the absence of which can lead to heart problems.
Sometimes it all started because one of the partners was rejected. The rejected partner may withdraw into himself, unable to talk about the lack of sex because he feels ashamed for not feeling sexually desired or because despite his age, for example, he still wants to make love. The worst fears of not being accepted are activated: those who are rejected will begin to believe that there is something revolting in themselves to push the other to this rejection. When it comes to the menopausal female partner it is sometimes just a question of reduced libido, due to hormonal issues, or because the mode of desire has changed.
Another commonplace to dispel: sex is not a stable “thing”. How we started our sex life like this will last forever. No! This is the big mistake that can be made !!! We change tastes in food, clothes, travel, furniture, ideas, we evolve in thoughts through culture and intelligence: why should our sexual tastes and modalities remain the same as when we met?
Learning to talk about sex within the couple should be one of the most sacrosanct “marital duties” as well as all service communications are made throughout the day.
